by Aquarius Dawn Nancy

We have been sharing present father's as part of our "Ode to Fathers" for a few years now. Father's Day Chronicles wants to bring solutions and examples of how to "Be" in many aspects of life we see deteriorating. One area of many HAY Online focuses on is the parent-child dynamic. 

I personally go through much in my role as a mother and mirror many situations men go through by alienating tactics of other parent. To help all parties involved whether a good strong united married couple with children to single family home, showcasing stories of fathers present can help.

It can help the young father dealing with a baby mother who is being impossible see through another man's story and images how they still are in their child's life. Trust, that father deals but in those images you see the confidence, smiles and tight hugs the kids give their daddy. Those shows of affection have nothing to do with a triffling mother, they just want their daddy. Some need to see other avenues to see their kids. Others need to be shown legal avenues to see their kids more if mother is the kind who is selfish. Yes, those mothers whom outside of abuse do not let fathers see kids because they just feel not enough support of any kind are terrible. No matter situation, handle that with dad outside child's presence, let father see child. It is the child who walks taller through life being able to sit at bench during school able to say, "My dad and I did...." You remember being a kid and talking about your dad, jumping into conversations with other kids giving their stories of being with theirs. Whether your dad was there or not, all kids at one point wish they could have had astory to tell even if from a broken home. 

Repair your home starting with a call to an existing father you have been dissing in many ways cause of anger you have and put it aside, invite him to park to play with his kids for starters. Do not argue either while they bond or ever in the child(rens) presence. Revel in their smiles and laughter playing with their dad. All else who do not have it this smooth, figure ways to mediate more time whether through your church pastor as counsel, the courts mediation services, or a respected member of the family you both can sit with and figure out visits. 

No matter the reason, do not let it be a barrier unless abuse and not the one made up to keep daddy away. Be the change you want to see, be the bigger parent and do not alienate your child(ren) from dad. 

We salute all dads period because they were and always are the reason you are mothers, grand-parents, uncles, aunts or God-parents. To the Mothers who know the dad is not worth much to them but understand their child needs to bond with dad and makes every effort to damn near paying his gas to get to park or bus fare, we salute you too. Trust, the other day my own son's father sent me Lyft money so I can take my son to his first Debate Camp. I say, "He can be a jerk to me, but he is a great father to our son." We were not compatible but for our son he goes above and beyond to damn near putting money in my pocket to have and spend on outings with him so I look good. Some parents do not let the other parents short comings hinder their bonding. Be that parent, the other parent getting it together finds strength and assurance in those acts to keep pushing on. Be the bigger parent. Try it!

Happy Father's Day!

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